February is considered Heart Month here by the Heart and Stroke Foundation, I never really thought too much about that until this year. Just before Valentine's Day my husband woke up with chest and (left) arm pain; he's only in his mid-30s.
Heart disease does run in his family - both his father and younger brother have had issues with their hearts, needless to say the warning bells were sounding loudly (or was that just my heart pounding?). He wanted to drive Storm to daycare before getting checked out at the hospital. Ummm, no way Jose, you go directly to the hospital now, do not pass go, do not collect $200! Unfortunately he had to drive himself there. Three hours later I reached him on his cell, he had had an EKG, blood work, and a few other tests. "I'll be home in half an hour" he said, "just waiting for the doc". Somehow I knew I wouldn't be seeing him in 30 minutes. Sure enough, the doc later told him he had had a "cardiac event" and would not let him leave the hospital to return the vehicle to me. We decided to wait until the next day before trying to find a way to get myself to the hospital. He spent the night in the ER and was transferred to one of the city hospitals the next morning for an angiogram. It was a restless night at home (and no doubt for him at the hospital too).
He called me the next morning to say the cardiologist informed him he could drive a truck through his arteries they were so clear. That was the good news, the bad news was the diagnosis of myocarditis - a infection of the heart muscle, most likely from a virus (but parasites and bacteria are also known culprits). He'd would spend the next 3 days in the ER. His heart had suffered some damage from the inflammation caused by his body's immune response to the virus whether this is permanent or not only time will tell. As the second day wore on so did my anxiety until at last I was able to reach someone to take me to the hospital to see him and pick up the vehicle. I told our friend just drop me off at the door (with the girls!) but thankfully he came in with me. No children under 12 allowed in the ER so he waited and watched the kids while I had a quick visit with Hunter. I had a few minutes with him before I had to run back to my children in the waiting room especially once Baby Breeze realized she was being left with someone she had never seen before! A few more back and forths and then, with a heavy heart, I left my husband in the ER to bring the girls home. One of the downsides of living away from family is having no one to back you up in a situation like this.
It has also put things in perspective for me. You can have all the plans in the world, for yourself, your family, your home, and then bam! a sucker punch out of the blue. Our biggest decisions of late have been focused on paint color and flooring type. Suddenly, I found myself thinking about the possibility of having to raise two little girls on my own - how? where? why?? I thought we were in control of our lives but we aren't, we are at the mercy of the unknown, and that scares me.
The View from my Hilltop
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